Ferris starts his day off


Incredible! One of the worst performances of my career and they never doubted it for a second.                          
How could I possibly be expected to handle school on a day like this?
This is my ninth sick day this semester. It’s getting pretty tough coming up with new illnesses. If I go for ten, I'm probably going to have to barf up a lung. So, I better make this one count.
The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good, non-specific symptom. I’m a big believer in it. Lots of people will tell you that a good phoney fever is a dead lock. But you get a nervous mother and you could wind up in a doctor's office and that's worse than school.       
Fake a stomach cramp and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, just lick your palms. It's a little stupid and childish but then so is high school. Right?
Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while you could miss out.

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